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655857 Posts in 9232 Topics by 3396 Members Latest Member: - vlozan86 Most online today: 21 - most online ever: 494 (Jul 01, 2007, 02:59:53 PM)
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Author Topic: Posts based on the decay of Cs-137 (random)  (Read 51992 times)
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elpollodiablo
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Posts: 32624


« Reply #500 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:10:01 PM »

So the gf's sister finally came out (well, she's out on her myspace

Taking the 'progress' out of 'progressive'

Just kidding. Luck to her!

Anyway. Evaluate this excerpted poem without context. No Googling. Just tell me what you think of it, first impressions. I will tell you that I didn't write it, nor did anyone I know.

"Papa said don't
so I don't tell
I keep it all
dug deep in my head...
I try to scream
I scream inside
it hurts too much
to silent cry--
my throat is choked
I hurt it so
from silent moans
deep down my throat."
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think 'on the road.'
Greg Nog
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Posts: 21629


« Reply #501 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:14:18 PM »

Is it T.S. Eliot?
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dieblucasdie
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Posts: 24493


« Reply #502 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:22:21 PM »

nah, there's no Dante references
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he was basically your only chance at making the world love you.
elpollodiablo
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Posts: 32624


« Reply #503 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:23:46 PM »

Goddammit you guys
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think 'on the road.'
martin_van_buren
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Posts: 2062


« Reply #504 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:25:57 PM »

It's Winger, isn't it?
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dieblucasdie
Registered user

Posts: 24493


« Reply #505 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:30:09 PM »

Goddammit you guys

Fine, I'd say it's probably either like, late-60s, early-70s "teh feminists are here, jerks! Listen to us!"

Or else it's more contemporary and written by someone for whom English is not a first language to draw attention to the plight of women in the Third World.

Or both.

In either case it's pretty effective.  I suspect you're thinking it's simplistic and pat and cheesy or something but I don't agree. 
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he was basically your only chance at making the world love you.
diesel_powered
Registered user

Posts: 19210


« Reply #506 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:31:04 PM »

It's Winger, isn't it?
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Quote
she had me at "let's make a sandwich"
Mike24
Registered user

Posts: 1086


« Reply #507 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:31:12 PM »

did blucas just disagree with an opinion pollo hadn't even expressed yet?
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she doesn't like it too hot, she doesn't like it too cold, room temperature, room temperature
dieblucasdie
Registered user

Posts: 24493


« Reply #508 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:32:57 PM »

did blucas just disagree with an opinion pollo hadn't even expressed yet?

Yeah.  Maybe I'm wrong, but asking us to evaluate a poem out-of-context seems like a way of saying, "See!  This is no different from livejournal poetry without the context!"  But maybe that's not the case.
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he was basically your only chance at making the world love you.
C of heartbreak
Registered user

Posts: 5285


« Reply #509 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:35:30 PM »

I was thinking, if you did google it it'd be near impossible to do with a single line, because they're all so cliche.

So it sucks.

Though I am assuming pollo wrote it
« Last Edit: Apr 01, 2008, 03:39:45 PM by C of heartbreak » Logged

HOW WOULD I BE? WHAT WOULD I DO?
Greg Nog
Registered user

Posts: 21629


« Reply #510 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:43:53 PM »

I googled it using "dug deep in my head".  One of four results was the poem.  I'm shocked that none of the rest were about earwigs.
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C of heartbreak
Registered user

Posts: 5285


« Reply #511 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:45:06 PM »

Haha I just got it using that one too actually. (Sorry for cheating Sad)
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HOW WOULD I BE? WHAT WOULD I DO?
Andrew_TSKS
Registered user

Posts: 39426


« Reply #512 on: Apr 01, 2008, 03:59:19 PM »

hah, it reads like papa roach lyrics to me. am i an asshole? let me google it now.

EDIT: haha oh man.
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I just want to be myself and I want you to love me for who I am.
C of heartbreak
Registered user

Posts: 5285


« Reply #513 on: Apr 01, 2008, 04:02:27 PM »

Well livejournal poetry and be compelling and socially relevant, but that doesn't mean it can't suck.
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HOW WOULD I BE? WHAT WOULD I DO?
elpollodiablo
Registered user

Posts: 32624


« Reply #514 on: Apr 01, 2008, 04:19:50 PM »

Goddammit you guys

Fine, I'd say it's probably either like, late-60s, early-70s "teh feminists are here, jerks! Listen to us!"

Or else it's more contemporary and written by someone for whom English is not a first language to draw attention to the plight of women in the Third World.

Or both.

In either case it's pretty effective.  I suspect you're thinking it's simplistic and pat and cheesy or something but I don't agree. 

It's bad poetry.
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think 'on the road.'
Andrew_TSKS
Registered user

Posts: 39426


« Reply #515 on: Apr 01, 2008, 04:48:45 PM »

what's interesting is that blucas called the origin of the poem.
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I just want to be myself and I want you to love me for who I am.
elpollodiablo
Registered user

Posts: 32624


« Reply #516 on: Apr 01, 2008, 04:58:20 PM »

It's not exactly hard to place.

The reason I wanted to de-contextualize it was not to point to its comparative lack of subtlety or merit (it does read as bad livejournal poetry, after all), but to see if others' reactions to it would be similar to mine if they encountered it outside of a particularly poorly-written piece of scholarship that kind of plops it down in the middle of an argument like a turd.
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think 'on the road.'
ellaguru
Registered user

Posts: 5447


« Reply #517 on: Apr 01, 2008, 08:20:54 PM »

Ahh, it's safely* above freezing today in the Great White North, for the first day since, I don't know, beginning of December. Another day of this and all the snow will be gone.



*it's spent a couple hours of the last few months at, like, 1 or 2 degrees, but today it's hit 10 degrees, so it actually feels not-cold.

... and then it hailed on me on my bike ride home. April truly is the cruelest month.

- OK, back to your poetry discussion. Don't mind me.
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I also engaged in a rigorous study of philosophy and religion...but cheerfulness kept creeping in.
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