Lists, Part 17: Lister Bangs

[jebreject]

I'm pretty sure 7 or 8 inches flaccid is pretty much ginormous dude

Yer sick

[Aglaya]

Oh, was he supposed to be flaccid?  I assumed that was full mast. 

Yea, 7 or 8 is huge for flaccid.

[morgan]

I don't know, man, I always see women on TV or in movies or whatever talking about how they won't take anything less than 9" or something, and all I can think is, I don't want to be impaled, come on, what the hell is with these women?  I don't get it, wouldn't a foot-long cock HURT?  Seriously, now.

[Aglaya]

Yea, that shit's pretty dumb.  I used to be a bit of a size queen, but I got over that because, well, it's dumb.

[Greg Nog]

I don't know, man, I always see women on TV or in movies or whatever talking about how they won't take anything less than 9" or something

The best part of this is the obvious question of which movies and TV you're watching.  I can't remember the last film I saw that featured women talking about nine-inch mancocks.

[YojimboMonkey]

I don't think the "man" prefix is necessary there, is it?

Also I remember thinking it looked unrealistically narrow during the reveal but it was long as hell, I don't know what Crissee's smoking, besides 18 inch cocks or some shit.

[morgan]

Ok, that was a slight exaggeration, but I know I've seen it talked about in at least a few movies / TV shows and it's always really confused me. 

What I'm trying to say is, I watch porn 24/7.

[hannah]

porn 24/7

in which Kiefer Sutherland takes it in every orifice at once!

[girl]

I don't think the "man" prefix is necessary there, is it?

Necessary?  Maybe not, but it's funnier that way.

porn 24/7

in which Kiefer Sutherland takes it in every orifice at once!

Sometimes I wish I had cable.

[diesel_powered]

porn 24/7

in which Kiefer Sutherland takes it in every orifice at once!

I'd buy that for a dollar!

[jebreject]

Guys seriously I mean I know I have a girlfriend and all and she likes my cock just fine but it's good to be reassured that not every cock (or even most of them) is nine inches or better. Jesus Christ.

(Jesus Christ, by the way, had a HUGE cock. I've seen it.)

[milesofsparks]

so, moving back into the old apartment I had before I left for grad school (actually before I moved in with the ex, which was before I left for grad school) has moved me to meditate on the changes that grad school has wrought upon me.  thus:

A Few of the Things That Have Changed About Me During Grad School

before  pretty much never hung out in bars
after  pretty often hang out in bars

before  couldn't handle any coffee at all
after  happy to drink 5 cups in a day (though I usually restrict myself to 2)

before  really extremely long hair (knee-length)
after  normally long hair (boob-length)

before  kind of freaked out by the idea of internet friends
after  I probably spend more time talking to imaginary friends than "real" friends

before  pretty intelligent
after  brain turned to lime jello

before  engaged to be married
after  footloose and fancy free

before  rarely listened to music
after  listen to music all the time

before  never talked to strangers
after  well, I still only talk to strangers if I'm drunk, overly caffeinated, or the stranger is a very very handsome boy, but it's a start


OK, draw your own conclusions from that you who are applying to grad school.

[RoyBiggins]

How did being in grad school make you less smart?  Like, I have examples in my head of how college made me lazy. But I'm interested to hear your take on why you went through that change.

[das kranke Tier]

Burn out, I'd imagine.

That's what it does to my brain.

[dumbfish]

FWIW, I think most of miles' changes are upgrades.  I mean, even lime Jell-O's tasty.

before: Vision 20/20 or better
after: Squint at road signs, monitors

before: keen interest to talk about thesis topic
after: keen interest to talk about anything but

[milesofsparks]

How did being in grad school make you less smart?  Like, I have examples in my head of how college made me lazy. But I'm interested to hear your take on why you went through that change.

there was a lot of brainwashing.  like actual brain washing techinques--lack of food, lack of sleep, wildly varying temperatures, constant public humiliation, etc. in a clear attempt to make us think the correct things.  also, imo architects are not great writers or critical thinkers in general (there are exceptions, and I'm not including historians or theoreticians in that group) so I could get away with really really lazy writing.  which is not to say they're stupid--they're more visual thinkers.  my visual thinking has probably improved.

and burnout is *definitely* a factor.  I'm still fucking exhausted.  the first 2 years were so controlled and intense that I lost my spine after that.  my procrastination increased massively because there was never time to get anything done except the night before deadlines.  I now have the ability to write a decent 30 page paper in one night, though.

mostly, though, I feel like I was so focused for 4 years (and I was less focused than many) that I lost the ability to talk intelligently about more general things, like current events.  it'll all come back, of course, once I have time to read normal books, see movies, etc.  I've spent most of the summer trying to catch up with normal life.  hence the lack of job as of yet.

I think they're mostly upgrades, too, dumbfish.  and I am being a wee bit facetious about being stupider, though I do feel a bit ill equipped to deal with normal life after living in a pack for so long.

[Andrew_TSKS]

you know, mos and dumbfish, your posts remind me of how fygmynt got his mfa and never wrote anything again. it seems to me like grad school is similar to what would happen if someone kidnapped me and said "oh, so your favorite food is burritos? well, we're going to make you eat burritos for every meal for the next four years! and gut-busting amounts of them at each meal, too! we'll see how much you like burritos after we're done with you!" this all just makes me appreciate the fact that i dropped out of college that much more.

[diesel_powered]

I just want to take this opportunity to say that since going to grad school, I'm better rested and am doing better work than I've ever done. But then again, I go to weirdo hippy grad school.

[Trousers and Pat]

If only grad school was more like the 36 chambers of Shaolin. You know you watch the flame and carry the buckets of water before you even think about a book, or architecture, or burritos.

[Andrew_TSKS]

i take exception to that. i'd need at least the occasional burrito.

[diesel_powered]

The whole 36 chambers thing was more or less undergrad for me. Only wayyyyyyyyy less cool.


Things to do this evening:

Target: Buy contact solution, wheel cleaner, possibly Inland Empire in the bizarre off chance they have it.

Gas station: Gas and car wash

Barnes & Noble: Inland Empire (cuz I can use my mom's discount card).

[das kranke Tier]

this all just makes me appreciate the fact that i dropped out of college that much more.

See, undergraduate school was all kittens, rainbows, and girls wearing white t-shirts soaked in whiskey and cheap beer for me.  It was one of the most fabulous times in my life.

Grad school, not so much.

[milesofsparks]

grad school:  It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness...

I am liable to bitch about it (especially since I'm about to start paying for it), but it was also an increadible experience.  very intense, I made a lot of great friends, and, despite my current jello brain, I did learn some stuff.  so take my whinging with a grain of salt.

[das kranke Tier]

I only talk to about 4 or 5 people that I go to school with. 

I'd like to slap the rest of them with a large trout.

[milesofsparks]

cities for which I carry active bus/metro passes with money on them:
1.  New York
2.  Boston
3.  Istanbul

cities/boroughs for which I have active library cards
1.  Brooklyn
2.  New York
3.  Boston
4.  Seattle

distances traveled this summer
1.  by car (me driving):  > 3,000 mi
2.  by plane:  about 1,400 mi
3.  by car (others driving):  > 500 mi
4.  by bus:  about 1,500
5.  subways, trains, pack animals:  unknown


basically, what I'm saying is I need to settle down for awhile.  right after I ride to the ferry to the island, then return, then take the bus back to NYC.  then I will stay within the bounds of the Metropolitan Transportation Authority for as long as possible.